Talking to Your Teens about Teen Dating Violence Month (TDVAM)

Written by:  Jennifer F Tofaeono, Alliance Ex Director
     It is February 14, 2023, and we celebrate Valentine’s Day.  Today we celebrate romance and love by sending flowers and candies to our Valentine’s.  It is the day we put our love life on display, as we plan romantic dinners, and send roses.  It is the month of love and heart.  It is also Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, and as parents it is critical that we are aware of what our teenagers are facing as they develop romantic relationships.
    In American Samoa at least 35.4% of Samoan Youths stated they experienced sexual dating violence, and 23.7% were physically forced to have sexual intercourse, as reported by CDC Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance System (YRBSS).  Every year in the United States nearly 1.5 million high school students are victims of abuse from a partner.  Women between the ages of 16 and 24 are abused at 3 times the national average, and almost half of dating college women experience abusive behavior. 
     As a parent it is crucial you begin to strengthen communication with your teens.  Encourage your teens to have open, and honest discussions about healthy relationships.  Remember that being a parent is not always easy, especially when helping them to navigate a romantic relationship. Bear in mind they are teenagers, and their brains are still developing.  This impacts their personality and decision-making.  Our children face a lot of pressure when it comes to sex, substance abuse and dating.  Teens are known to want their parents guidance in situations they face, make sure you’re available. 
It is not easy to be a parent but remember to focus on the positive.  Talk to your teenagers about what a healthy relationship is like. Get to know what makes your kids soar, and feel appreciated—find how you can connect with your teenager.  Lastly, recognize that parents do not have the answer for everything, and mistakes can happen.  When this happens, remember we all make mistakes, but continue to be an active participant in your teens life.  Be firm, and if your teen is not ready to talk to you, refer him/her to a confidential resource.  If at any time you feel that your teen is in immediate danger, call 911. 
Data:
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (2023) High school Youth Behavior Surveillance System (YRBSS) retrieved on 2/14/2023 from: https://nccd.cdc.gov/youthonline/App/Results.aspx?TT=L&SID=HS&QID=QNINDOORTANNING&LID=AS&LID2=SL&YID=YY&YID2=SY&SYID=&EYID=&HT=QQ&LCT=LL&COL=T&ROW1=N&ROW2=N&TST=false&C1=&C2=&SC=DEFAULT&SO=ASC&VA=CI&CS=Y&DP=1&QP=G&FG=G1&FA=A1&FR=R1&FS=S1&FSC=P1&FSI=I1