written by:  Jennifer Tofaeono, Executive Director
There are only so many hours in a day. We find ourselves going to work, or school. We return home to clean and take care of our family members.  We pay our bills as best as we can, but when we are overwhelmed from the daily challenges, this increases nervousness, and life can become stressful. We may have a difficult time controlling our anger. Particularly if you are feeling overwhelmed.  Anxiety can activate feelings or responses that cause types of violence and aggression. 
One coping mechanism to build resilience is exercise. It is a great way to care for your body, while improving both your physical and mental health ​Research has shown how the brain releases chemicals to help us better manage stress and anxiety through exercise.  Some ideas to move, is to take a walk.  If you are in Tafuna you can use the Office of Motor Vehicle (OMVW) paved track to walk or use the Tafuna sidewalks.  Walking with friends helps to make it fun.  You can catch up on news, stay connected, while increasing your energy and mood.  You can join a fitness group, like SSY (Slimmer Stronger You) that helps to change mindsets to lose weight and improve cardiovascular fitness through exercise.  I find myself getting stronger, and the camaraderie, support we provide to each other as we sweat it out  makes me feel connected.  I feel good.  I have found a great support group, and gained knowledge thru tips to improve health. 
Every month we write about resilience, with the purpose to provide tips and coping mechanisms to stay well and decrease anxiety.  These times people are finding it hard to manage feelings of anxiety or emotional distress.  It is important that we remind our community how to cope with stressful situations to nurture resilience.  Knowing  your values, what is important to you, or your purpose help individuals to persist in the face of setbacks.  Surrounding yourself with good social support by building quality relationships, reminds us we are not alone.  We can lean on others as we deal with difficult situations.  Flexibility through crisis, is why coping skills are crucial,  to maintaining resilience. 
When you exercise it helps with anxiety and sleep.  I have difficult mornings or days when I do not want to exercise, and I listen to my body and rest.  I remind myself that tomorrows a new day, and I will make sure to exercise then.  When I allow myself the needed rest, I am focused and feel accomplished at the end of my workout.  There is clarity in my thinking, and I feel good. Exercise is a great way to build resiliency during stressful moments.  

Written by:  Jennifer Tofaeono, Executive Director
Every week I read a newsletter article involving domestic violence or sexual assault.  May 4th, 2021 Samoa Newspaper reported “Man who allegedly tried to molest a 12-year-old now in custody.” Immediately my heart felt despair for the victim and the family.  I imagine this victim returning home, and the harm he placed on her.  It  is a scar that she will carry every day for the rest of her life. I think of the mother’s statement that “her daughter was crying and scared”. Domestic violence and sexual assault cause health consequences for all victims.  Depression, post-traumatic stress, and anxiety disorders can impede a victim’s mental capacity.  One study done in 2013 reported women who experienced domestic and sexual violence were almost twice as likely to experience depression and problem drinking. 
For the month of May as we talk about mental health, I want to remind our community we can help to empower those who are victims of violence.  Our community is extremely close.  We are related and can recall our family lineage; we have real connections.   Victims of violence come from a large family network, which means they have a great support group.  When I speak to victims of violence who are healing, they mention how important the role of their family played in promoting healing.  Often, we are not quite sure how to respond to victims.  We say things like, “Stop crying, you’ll be ok”, or we blame the victim, “If you would’ve come straight home this wouldn’t have happened.”  As support systems, I encourage you to change those responses, to make sure you do not cause more damage to the victim.  It is important to remember no one ever wants to be sexually violated or beaten. 
Instead, you can start a conversation by saying, “I’m worried about you because….” Or “I have noticed some changes that concern me…”  Practice saying them over and over until it becomes an automatic response when you talk to a victim. You can help by listening to their stories without judgment, offering advice or giving them a solution.  When you choose to actively listen, you will be able to hear exactly what the victim needs.  Make sure to allow the person the time to talk. Believe them, and let them know by saying, “I believe you,”, “It’s not your fault,” or “You don’t deserve this”. 
If you’re still at a loss on how to help a victim, then help them to find the support and resources they need.  Helping them to contact Department of Social Services, Department of Health, American Samoa Legal Aid, Catholic Social Services or getting the number to a Pastor can provide great support.  Accompany them if they ask you too.  Most importantly remind them you are there for them will help to relieve mental stress to get to healing.  

Everyone faces difficult days. During these trying times COVID-19 has impacted our families, the way we engage or chose not to engage. For Samoans who thrive on familial connections this can be difficult. For victims of violence whose voices are silenced to shield embarrassment, or are beaten for sharing their voice it causes great internal stress. We are told to be patient. The world will come around, and we are told to wait. 
What if we chose a different response? That we can take action to control our situation by developing resiliency skills. When we are knocked down by life, why not use resiliency to come back stronger, to rise from the ashes.  In previous articles we have shared the benefit of optimism, and positive attitudes to change  outlook, to  change an individual’s course.    

We need to be around other people in moments of stress. There are others who share your feelings, concerns, and worries. Many times, when faced with a difficult situation we tend to isolate, but studies show sharing your worries, or struggles with someone you can trust can provide relief. Enjoy your surroundings. We live in such a beautiful place surrounded by beaches, green mountains, spectacular sunsets and sunrises. Nature improves our perspective.  

Create new goals and take action to
reach these goals. If a goal seems (like losing weight) seems insurmountable break it down to small steps that you can make (i.e. drink water for the day, walk for five minutes). The focus is to find ways to motivate yourself to act to take one small step. You can learn to breathe to center and ground yourself during stressful moments. Breathing helps with mindfulness as you are required to listen to your breathing in that moment. Use a journal to write about those thoughts that weigh you down and identify daily struggles. If you are not accustomed to focusing or writing about yourself this practice can be extremely challenging, but if you work on it every day with intention it has proven to help move people to finding a safe space. Lastly, each day write three things you are grateful for. Practice this for over a period of 30 days and you will see the change in your outlook when challenges arise. 
Each month the Alliance will continue to share actions that can help to change your state of mind and heal from stressful moments. You can do one or all the tips provided. Remember action to wellness is what will take you to a healthy place.